Golden Rise Bakery

Ratings Guide:
Half handshake, half chest-bump hug – 5 stars
Chest bump – 4 stars
Fist bump – 3 stars
High five – 2 stars
Handshake – 1 star
Manly ass slap – ½ star
Fone and fone – 0 stars


Restaurant: Golden Rise Bakery
Location: 2957 W. Diversey Ave.


A sale of the building where Golden Rise Bakery once resided in Oak Park drove them from their location. But, rather than close up shop, they decided to give it another shot at a new location. Lucky for me the new location is close to my crib. To celebrate Golden Rise, I’m gonna break it down with some other famous “golds”.


A GOLDEN OPPORTUNITY
Golden Rise had the chance to close up shop after being forced out of their previous location, but they didn’t. Instead, they seized the opportunity and headed to a new location, taking a chance that they would find a new set of devoted customers in Logan Square. Well, they’ve found at least one (actually, according to Yelp.com it’s more like 9).


THE GOLDEN RULE
The basic message of The Golden Rule is to “treat others as you would like to be treated.” Let me tell you, nobody treats people better than Golden Rise. I can’t remember a time when I have experienced better customer service. The first time I went there the guy who waited on me gave me samples of anything and everything, and when I was done ordering he threw a couple free pastries in the bag. Service with a smile goes without saying here. The last time I was there a very rude customer was upset that they didn’t have cappuccino, and that there wasn’t more choices for breakfast sandwiches. But rather than react in any sort of negative way the lady working the counter (who I believe is one of the owners) just killed the man with kindness. No matter how upset he wanted to be, he just couldn’t keep it up. No matter that you think of the food here, you can’t help but have a good experience because of the people. They alone will keep me coming back.


AS GOOD AS GOLD
This perfectly describes the Basil Chicken Salad sandwich. As many of you know (and by many I mean all seven people who read the America’s Dog week-long review) I’m not a chicken salad guy. But one night here I was ordering a couple of sandwiches for me and my wife, and I couldn’t figure out what to get her. The guy behind the counter suggested the Chicken Salad and gave me a taste. I didn’t even want to try it. The thought of even a small taste made me uneasy. But once I had a bite I couldn’t get enough. This thing is one of the best sandwiches I’ve ever had. I liked it that much. The day I was there it was the special, but since then they’ve added it to the menu (thank god). Obviously since this is a bakery you expect the bread to be superb. And it is. I had the chicken salad (actually, my wife “had it”, but I consumed about 75% of it) on wheat. The bread is almost too much (almost, but not quite). It’s huge. You honestly feel like each slice is a loaf. It’s just these two huge doughy squares. I love bread. And for me, bread can make or break a sandwich. Or be so-so and have no effect on the sandwich either way (pretty eye-opening stuff, isn’t it?). Any who, I love the bread here. And it adds to the sandwich. Which is hard to do because the sandwiches are incredibly tasty to begin with.


WORTH THEIR WEIGHT IN GOLD
The loaves of bread are. And not just the typical wheat, sourdough, or multi-grain. But the specialty breads like “jalapeño cheese” and “Russian rye”. And don’t get me started on the apple cinnamon or banana walnut bread. When you pick them up they feel like they’re 100 lbs. But when you slice them they are delicious and light and fluffy. I really can’t get enough of them. And if you’re not picky (like me) then you can get the “day old” version for half the price. And it doesn’t taste a day older at all. What a deal.


GOLDEN SHOWER
They don’t have golden showers here, but I’ve asked to have them added to the menu. Needless to say they’ve yet to do it. But there’s still hope.


SILENCE IS GOLDEN
The place is pretty quite these days. Each time I’ve been in there I haven’t seen more than a couple other customers, and most of them are getting things to go.


POT OF GOLD
I’d say the ice cream, but I haven’t tried it. But it’s ice cream, so how bad can it be?


ALL THAT GLITTERS IS NOT GOLD
The Breakfast Sandwiches. They sound good. They’re served on bread that is terrific. But there’s nothing special about them. They’re not bad; they’re just not the kind of breakfast sandwiches you’d go out of your way for. If you’re in the area, it’s a fine choice, because they are fresh. But the choices are limited (Egg, with a choice of bacon, ham, or cheese), and if you’re looking for breakfast, I’d highly suggest…


GOLD MINE
The pastries. I haven’t had a bad one yet. The chocolate croissant is my favorite. Tons of chocolate. And the cakes are also amazing. Call ahead and order a whole one for your next birthday party. You won’t regret it.


THE GOLDEN CHILD
I loved this movie. Remember when Eddie Murphy was funny? (and if your reaction to that question is, “What are you talking about? Norbit and The Nutty Professor 2 and Dr. Doolittle are funny.” then you’re dead to me.)


THE GOLD STANDARD
This would be the Farmer’s Basket Grilled Cheese. It’s a delicious combination of Gouda, Muenster, and cheddar cheeses, granny smith apple slices, and bacon (which makes everything better). It really is a great combo of flavors. The saltiness of the cheeses and bacon, perfectly complimented by the sweet juices of the granny smith apple. My only caveat is that if you order it to go it loses a little something by the time you get it home. It just doesn’t have that fresh-off-the-grill heat that I like with my grilled cheeses. So, if you order it, I recommend eating it there.


GOLDEN RISE BAKERY
A great add to the neighborhood. Great place for sandwiches. Great place for breads. Great place for pastries. And probably a great place for ice cream. Fist bump with a manly ass slap. I’ll be making many, many visits here.


Got a question? Send it to josh@borntofork.com.