Drunken Fish

Ratings Guide:
Half handshake, half chest-bump hug – 5 stars
Chest bump – 4 stars
Fist bump – 3 stars
High five – 2 stars
Handshake – 1 star
Manly ass slap – ½ star
Fone and fone – 0 stars



Restaurant: Drunken Fish
Location: #1 Maryland Plaza Drive


A couple weeks ago when Dru and I went to check out Pineapple Express, I came out of the theater indifferent. The movie is probably best described as “fine”.

The thing is, the movie wasn’t good. But it had some really good moments. Most of the scenes with Red were really funny. And the idea of Dale dating a high school girl was amusing. And when he told her (um, I guess I should say something about a SPOILER ALERT! But it won’t really spoil anything, so read on) he loved her, her reaction and his reaction to her reaction, were priceless. And anytime someone reference British Knights I’m going to laugh. And you know why? Because BK’s are funny. And awesome. But again, the movie wasn’t good, it just happened to have some good moments.

I also wouldn’t say the movie was bad, just that it had some bad moments. For one, it was at least 15 minutes too long. Actually, more like 20-25. The final scene was painfully drawn out, to the point that a lady in the theater (who was clearly not amused by this movie, but also refused to walk out at any point) screamed at the screen “shut the fu@% up!” It was fantastic. In fact, it was easily one of the five funniest moments in the movie, even though it wasn’t actually in the movie. And Red being basically indestructible got kind of old by the end. And even though there were plenty of bad moments, I still wouldn’t say it was a bad movie.

Pineapple Express wasn’t good. And Pineapple Express wasn’t bad. It was just stuck somewhere in the middle. A place I like to call “just OK” or “fine”.

And that’s exactly how I felt when I walked out of Drunken Fish.

It had its good moments. Like the Tiger roll, which had a nice balance of some sweetness when it hit your tongue, and some heat by the time it was sliding down your throat. And the deep-fried Philly roll (which in a way is cheating). And the beer was cold, and they have some great outdoor seating.

Drunken Fish also had its bad moments. Like the St. Louis roll. Don’t ever order this roll. I’m not even sure what was in it anymore, but it was terrible. We started dipping it in the left over eel sauce from the Tiger roll, and even that didn’t help. I didn’t finish the roll, if that tells you anything. And the Spider roll, which was pretty disappointing.

And everything else was very average. The spicy tuna was nothing to write home about, but worth finishing. And the soup was fine, but tasted like every other soup at every other sushi place I’ve ever had. And the inside was fine. Didn’t feel like it was trying too hard, but there wasn’t anything unique or cozy about it either.

I don’t know what else to tell you. Would I go back? Yeah, if other people wanted to go, I would. Would I recommend it to people looking for sushi? No. If I had a sushi craving would this be a place I’d consider? Probably not, unless I was in the area or something.

So that’s it. I’m not even sure what to give it. I wish I had created a ranking that represented “eh”. But since I didn’t, I guess I’ll go with the high five with a manly ass slap.


By the way, I’m not sure if you noticed or not, but I used the word “and” a lot. 20 times, actually. That’s about 3.5% of the words I typed. Just wanted to apologize for that. It seems excessive in hindsight.



Got a question? Send it to josh@borntofork.com.