Webster Wine Bar

Ratings Guide:
Half handshake, half chest-bump hug – 5 stars
Chest bump – 4 stars
Fist bump – 3 stars
High five – 2 stars
Handshake – 1 star
Fone and fone – 0 stars
Manly ass slap – ½ star


Restaurant: Webster Wine Bar
Location: 1480 W. Webster


There are some things that get better with age. My basketball game is not one of them. At one point in my career I could shoot from the outside, hit fadeaways in defenders’ faces, effortlessly block shots, pass, and I could run the backdoor alleyoop better than almost anyone. Now, I can’t shoot, can’t play defense (and really, I never could), can’t jump, and I really can’t shoot. On Sunday I went 0-2 from beyond the arc, missed a couple of short jumpers in the lane, and looked incredibly awkward going in for a lay-up. Plus, I got my pocket picked trying to crossover a short, fat guy. But, I look great in basketball shorts. And that’s all that really matters to me these days anyway.

As far as those things that do get better with age, wine and cheese come to mind. And this past Friday I had a little of both at Webster Wine Bar. I’ve been here a couple of times, and I really like it. But, I’ve never eaten here. And honestly, I didn’t even know they had food.

Granted, the menu is pretty small, but the choices make it feel bigger than it really is. They have some salads, which we didn’t try, and some appetizers. We got a couple plates of cheese, some hummus, and some fried calamari. Shockingly, I’m not a huge fan of eating slices or blocks of cheese at a wine bar. Not sure why, since I love cheese so much. Maybe it’s a little too fancy for me. Maybe the fried calamari distracted me. Either way, I only had a couple pieces of the cheese, and they were fine. I’m told the hummus was really good (it was gone before I got a chance to give it a try, but I’m not a big fan of hummus, so I wasn’t trying that hard). I focused all of my attention on the fried calamari. It was the three “F”s - fantastic and flavorful and fried. When you hit the trifecta like that you can’t go wrong. I wish we would have ordered two plates of this.

For dinner I got the Cuban sandwich with fries. Awesome. The sandwich was juicy and not tough at all. Your teeth just sank into it. And the combo of meats (pork and a spicy ham) was terrific. And the fries – well, they were fried. That’s always good. But these were better than most.

My wife ordered a small pizza to share with another friend. The pizza wasn’t that big (supposedly 12 inches), and clearly these women couldn’t handle all 12”. Luckily, I could. I think I ate two pieces of it. It was mushroom and smoked mozzarella. And it was good. I wanted to order the pesto pizza, but thought better of it, as we were going to a movie and I would also consume some candy and soda there.

Some other orders at the table included the quesadilla, the lamb shank, and the penne pasta. By all accounts everyone enjoyed their meal. Although it’s tough to tell if Dima enjoys anything he eats, since he eats anything. I think you could serve him a paper plate drizzled with olive oil and he’d finish it quickly, think it was pretty good, and look around to see what else he could eat off of other peoples’ plates.

And we got three bottles of wine. The wine was great, and the recos of the server were right on. The only complaint I have is that although the waitress was super nice, she was also a very soft talker. It’s a miracle I didn’t walk out of the place wearing a puffy shirt.

And I didn’t even mention that we asked the place to switch our tables two times (three different tables), and they did without question or complaint each time. That’s always a good sign. Plus, I learned that our friends got engaged here. Awwwwwww.

So, Webster Wine Bar gets a chest bump. And my basketball skills get a high five.

Got a question? Send it to born2fork@yahoo.com.